Teacher - Bharat me

Teacher - Bharat me
Kitne Mahapurush paida huyr..?
Santa - Bharat me aajtak,
Koi Mahapurush to kya,
Purush bhi paida nahi hua...

Sab Bachche Hi Paida Huye..

santa ek bar jyotish ke paas gya.
jyotis-tumara naam santa hai.
santa-jee
jyotis-tumare patni ka naam doli hai.
santa-jee
jyotis-tumare 5 bacche hai.
santa-jee
jyotis-tum aaj 5 kilo chawal liye ho.
santa-are aap to antaryami hai.
jyotis-are bhag raashan card leke aaya hai,agli baar jnamkundli lekar aana.

Santa Ke Ghar Navjot Singh Siddhu Ki Tasveer Lagi Hui Dekh Kar Banta Ne Puchha.

Banta: “Ye Tasveer Kyun Laga Rakhi Hai?”

Santa: “Laughing Buddha Lene Gaya Tha, Dukandar Ne Kaha Ye Latest Hai Le Lo“

Announcmnt Ho Rha Tha
1Bacha Mila H JIN KA H
Aa Kar Le Jae
Santa Aaya Aur Kehne Laga,
Mujhe Bhi Dikha JIN ka Bacha Kaisa Hota Hai.

Santa shadi me bahut der se khana kha rha tha
1 aadmi:kitna khaoge?
Santa:mai khud pareshan hu yaar
Card me likha tha Dinner:7 to 11 pm

Santa school me hass raha tha,
1 ladka bola chup kar.
Santa:-Q,tum kaun ho..?
Ladka:-main moniter hun,
Santa bola:-main CPU hun...Ab bol

Santa:-
Ager "Bivi Ko "Bhootni Lipat Jaye,
To Tu Kya Karega ?
.
.
Banta:-
Mujhe"Kya Karna !
Ye Do "Behno"Ka"
Aapsi "Mamla" hai.

Dr.: Aapke 3 Danth Kaise Tut Gaye
SANTA.: Wife Ne Kadak Halwa Banaya
Tha Wo Khaya Isliye.
.
Dr.: To Halwa Khane Se Mana Kar Dete
.
SANTA.:-
Fir To 32 Ke 32 Tut Jaate.

Banta: Wo ladki deaf lagti hai.
Main kuch kehta hoon,
Woh kuch aur hi bolti hai.

Santa: Kaise?

Banta: Maine kaha I Luv U,
Oo woh boli ??
Maine kal hi,
Nayi Sandal kharidi hain??

Santa 2 riksawal: bhaiya hanuman mandir jaoge..
.
.
.
.
Riksawal: ha..
.
Santa: toh fir prasad lete aana.

Father: What did u learn at school?

Father: What did u learn at school?
.
.
.
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Santa : Give and take!
.
.
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Father: Good.
.
.
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Santa : Yes....I gave banta a punch and took his lunch.

Santa ne apni car ke niche
Kutte ko sota hua dekha,
To kutte ki taang pakad ke
Bahar kicha aur bola-
Bahar nikal sale,
Bada aaya Automobile Enginneer banne.

Daku Bank Lutne Gaye.
Gun Ghar Par Me Bhul Gaye
Fir B Bank Lut Lia

KAISE?
Bank Manager SANTA Tha
bola
koi baat nahi i trust u,
gun muze kal dikha dena...

Ruh kaap gyi,
Jb Santa ne banta ki Dadi se kaha-"Dadi koi accha sa gana to sunao?
Or dadi boli-

"Mere photo ko sine se yaar chipkale saiyan FEVICOL se"

Santa cigarate piche chupakar bola bata mere hath me kya hai?
Banta: Rail gadi
Santa: Tujhe kaise pata
Banta: Mene Dhuan nikalte dekha tha.!

100m ki race ho rahi thi.

The refree said' 1,2,3, GO!'
Everybody started running.

except Santa.

Refree- why r u not running?

Santa- my no.is 4.

Wife bathroom se naha ke nikli to Santa use ghur raha tha!
Wife romantic hokar:
Kuch karne ka irada hai kya?
Santa 2 thappad maar ke bola:
Mere garm pani se kyu nahayi!

Sant.2 riksewale
Bhaiya hanuman mandir jaoge.








Riksawala.-ha




Santa-to fir parsad lete aana

Sania Mirza : I hav each n evry knowledge abt tennis.U can ask me anything
santa:- ok tell me,
how many holes are in NET?
Sania shock.
Santa rocks.;-)

Ek baar 1 Train achanak patri se utar
gayi,
Kheton mein idhar udhar jaane
lagi aur fir wapas patri par aa gayi.
Railway walon ne enquiry bithai driver
Santa pe.
Puchha ki kya hua.
Santa:Ek aadmi patri par khada tha aur hat hi nahi raha tha.
Officer:Santa - Pagal ho kya? 1 admi ke liye tumne sare passengers ki zindagi jokhim mein daal di? Us 1 aadmi ko kuchal dena tha!!!
Santa:Main wahi to karne jaa raha tha
ki achanak wo patri se utar kar kheton
mein idhar udhar bhagne laga