Sardar in foreign country mein
Sardar ko foreign country mein ghumte hue shushu (urine) aay gaya.
Sardar sadak ke kinare khada hoken moot (urine) raha tha, to ek foreigner ne aaker poocha,
"tumahre yaha police nahi pakadta"
Sardar bola -- Nahi hame to khud se hi pakadna padta hia.
Aakhen teri ho magar
Aakhen teri ho magar aasun mere ho,
dil tera ho magar dharkan meri ho,
Khuda kare harami dosti itni gahri ho,
Ki baap tu bane magar mehnat meri ho.
Chemistry ki class
Chemistry ki class chal raha tha. Professor ne ek ladki se pucha- What is nitrates?
Ladki ne sharmate hue jawab diya, my night rates are higher then day rates. But I will give you discount, will charge same as day rate.
How did u got a new car
Banta:how did u got a new car?
Santa:A girl drove me to a beach, took her cloth &
and said: take what do u want & i took car
banta: good yaar kapde ki karne si.
Film Maachis
Film 'Maachis' being screened in a theatre and the song 'Chunni le ke soti thi kamaal lagti thi...' being played.
Suddenly a man shouted from the front stall, "Abe sirf chunni le ke soti thi to kamaal hi lagegi na..."
Husband asking his wife in bed
Husband asking his wife in bed : Thoda uper, Ab left, Itna nahi thoda right hoke piche.
Wife : You are fucking me or parking me?
Ganguly to his wife
Ganguly to his wife during sex- PITCH is dry, Grass not cut, Slow outfield.
Wife (Dona) replies- Nonsense!!! Inzamaam scored century on the same PITCH!!!!
What is the time
Women(2 sardar):What is the time?
Sardar replied d answer n was slapped.
Why?
He answered bra pantees(12:35).
New Budget for all Ladies
New Budget for all Ladies;
All ladies will be taxed according to bra sizes,
40-42 : Burden Tax.
38-40 : Wealth Tax.
34-36 : Entertainment Tax.
32-34 : Excitement Tax.
26-30 : Development Tax.
I have heard the Tax department is now working on cup sizes.
Ladkiyan bhi badi ajeeb hain
Ye ladkiyan bhi badi ajeeb cheez hoti hain....
kuchh kaho to muh jula deti hai,
kuchh karo to pet fula deti hain!
When a lady tells you that...
When a lady tells you that you are
Great,
Attractive,
Articulate,
Nice,
Dynamic,
Understanding ....means G.A.A.N.D.U.
and when she says You are...
Charming,
Handsome,
Optimistic,
Dashing,
Unbelievable, means you know what..
JAYA ki udasi
Sholey movie mein JAYA udas - udas kyo rehti thi?
Kyonki...THAKUR ke dono haath nahi the aur JAYA
ko hi THAKUR ki GAAND dhoni pad ti thi.
Doctor and nasbandi petient
Doctor ko nasbandi k patient k peeche bhagte dekh puchha - Kya hua?
Doctor : 4 bar se saala nasbandi ki baat karke kewal baal saaf karva kar bhaag jata hai.....
Six inches long
Q. What is six inches long that every women loves???
A. Hundred rupee note.
Na chahat hai sitaron ki
Na chahat hai sitaron ki,
na tamanna hai nazaaron ki,
aap jaisa ek dost mil jaaye,
maa chod denge saaro ki!
Din me karoge to
Din me karoge to sust rahoge,
Raat me karoge to chust rahoge
Karte rahoge to tandurast rahoge,
kya? U dirty mind,
I mean SMS Yaar.....
Uske hoto pe jo RASS hai
Uske hoto pe jo RASS hai,
SOM RASS hai,
seene pe jo AAM hai,
wahi CHAR DHAAM hai,
neeche jo VAN hai,
wo VRINDAVAN hai,
wan mai jo DWAR hai,
wohi HARIDWAR hai,
samjhe jai shree krishan.
Narad muni ka Krodh
Narad muni ko ek nari par aya krodh,
tab usne lena chaha usse pratishodh,
aur dia use pakad kar chod,
nari boli narad madarchod,
kya chod diya bina nirodh.
Sardar ko foreign country mein ghumte hue shushu (urine) aay gaya.
Sardar sadak ke kinare khada hoken moot (urine) raha tha, to ek foreigner ne aaker poocha,
"tumahre yaha police nahi pakadta"
Sardar bola -- Nahi hame to khud se hi pakadna padta hia.
Aakhen teri ho magar
Aakhen teri ho magar aasun mere ho,
dil tera ho magar dharkan meri ho,
Khuda kare harami dosti itni gahri ho,
Ki baap tu bane magar mehnat meri ho.
Chemistry ki class
Chemistry ki class chal raha tha. Professor ne ek ladki se pucha- What is nitrates?
Ladki ne sharmate hue jawab diya, my night rates are higher then day rates. But I will give you discount, will charge same as day rate.
How did u got a new car
Banta:how did u got a new car?
Santa:A girl drove me to a beach, took her cloth &
and said: take what do u want & i took car
banta: good yaar kapde ki karne si.
Film Maachis
Film 'Maachis' being screened in a theatre and the song 'Chunni le ke soti thi kamaal lagti thi...' being played.
Suddenly a man shouted from the front stall, "Abe sirf chunni le ke soti thi to kamaal hi lagegi na..."
Husband asking his wife in bed
Husband asking his wife in bed : Thoda uper, Ab left, Itna nahi thoda right hoke piche.
Wife : You are fucking me or parking me?
Ganguly to his wife
Ganguly to his wife during sex- PITCH is dry, Grass not cut, Slow outfield.
Wife (Dona) replies- Nonsense!!! Inzamaam scored century on the same PITCH!!!!
What is the time
Women(2 sardar):What is the time?
Sardar replied d answer n was slapped.
Why?
He answered bra pantees(12:35).
New Budget for all Ladies
New Budget for all Ladies;
All ladies will be taxed according to bra sizes,
40-42 : Burden Tax.
38-40 : Wealth Tax.
34-36 : Entertainment Tax.
32-34 : Excitement Tax.
26-30 : Development Tax.
I have heard the Tax department is now working on cup sizes.
Ladkiyan bhi badi ajeeb hain
Ye ladkiyan bhi badi ajeeb cheez hoti hain....
kuchh kaho to muh jula deti hai,
kuchh karo to pet fula deti hain!
When a lady tells you that...
When a lady tells you that you are
Great,
Attractive,
Articulate,
Nice,
Dynamic,
Understanding ....means G.A.A.N.D.U.
and when she says You are...
Charming,
Handsome,
Optimistic,
Dashing,
Unbelievable, means you know what..
JAYA ki udasi
Sholey movie mein JAYA udas - udas kyo rehti thi?
Kyonki...THAKUR ke dono haath nahi the aur JAYA
ko hi THAKUR ki GAAND dhoni pad ti thi.
Doctor and nasbandi petient
Doctor ko nasbandi k patient k peeche bhagte dekh puchha - Kya hua?
Doctor : 4 bar se saala nasbandi ki baat karke kewal baal saaf karva kar bhaag jata hai.....
Six inches long
Q. What is six inches long that every women loves???
A. Hundred rupee note.
Na chahat hai sitaron ki
Na chahat hai sitaron ki,
na tamanna hai nazaaron ki,
aap jaisa ek dost mil jaaye,
maa chod denge saaro ki!
Din me karoge to
Din me karoge to sust rahoge,
Raat me karoge to chust rahoge
Karte rahoge to tandurast rahoge,
kya? U dirty mind,
I mean SMS Yaar.....
Uske hoto pe jo RASS hai
Uske hoto pe jo RASS hai,
SOM RASS hai,
seene pe jo AAM hai,
wahi CHAR DHAAM hai,
neeche jo VAN hai,
wo VRINDAVAN hai,
wan mai jo DWAR hai,
wohi HARIDWAR hai,
samjhe jai shree krishan.
Narad muni ka Krodh
Narad muni ko ek nari par aya krodh,
tab usne lena chaha usse pratishodh,
aur dia use pakad kar chod,
nari boli narad madarchod,
kya chod diya bina nirodh.
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